Whether they embrace the concept or oppose it, Sacramento's religious groups are grappling with the arrival Monday of legal same-sex marriages in California.
Churches willing to host same-sex marriages are rewriting wedding vows and marriage pamphlets, replacing "bride" and "groom" with non-gender-specific words. At Sierra Arden United Church of Christ in Sacramento, "bridal party" is now "wedding party" in church brochures.
"We want everyone to feel welcome," said Pam Engle, office manager.
Not all congregations are as inviting.
From Catholics to Methodists, most large, mainstream churches are against it. Other faiths still are debating whether to perform same-sex marriages. Individual clergy willing to wed gay couples are hesitant to go against church law and religious tradition.
Sacramento area houses of worship have had only a handful of requests for same-sex weddings since the state Supreme Court's May 15th ruling overturned a ban on gay marriage. Still, they are getting ready. One church is organizing a mass wedding in August.
Religious groups that oppose gay marriage are putting just as much energy into overturning the ruling. Some, like Roman Catholics and evangelicals, are urging congregants to vote in November for a constitutional amendment that would ban same-sex marriage.
"The court has imposed its fiat on society, and Catholics need to speak up," said Bishop Jaime Soto, co-adjutor of the Catholic Diocese of Sacramento. He adds that Pope Benedict XVI has urged Catholics to be active in the public square. "I think many Catholics may be tempted to keep their convictions quiet … but this is not the time."
Diocesan officials are encouraging clergy to preach about the issue and instructing religious educators to talk about it with students. Many churches plan to hand out literature about their views in the coming months.
One group that has spoken out against homosexuality has no plans to protest the marriages that begin Monday evening.
"We are not planning anything as an organization," said Victor Chernyetsky, administrator of Slavic Missionary Church in Sacramento, the largest Slavic church in the area, with 3,500 members.
To him, the unions are unholy. "These are sinful marriages and against the Bible," said Chernyetsky. "Marriage is between one man and one woman."
Presbyterians will likely address the California ruling when members from across the country gather for the national convention of their church governing body in San Jose on June 21. The Presbyterian church officially opposes gay marriage but allows clergy to bless same-sex couples.
"This took us all by surprise, and we're trying to play catch-up," said the Rev. David Thompson, pastor of Westminster Presbyterian in Sacramento. Thompson says he would love to preside over a same-sex wedding but will follow church regulations and not perform one at this time.
The Episcopal church has been debating gay rights for the past five years – since the 2003 election of Gene Robinson, the first openly gay bishop.
Last week, Robinson and his longtime partner were united in a civil ceremony in New Hampshire and later blessed at their church.
Like the Presbyterians, the Episcopal church does not allow gay marriage. Some dioceses permit their clergy to bless same-sex couples. The Northern California diocese, based in Sacramento, does not allow the blessings.
"Gays and lesbians want their relationships to be blessed like anybody else's," said Robinson, who will speak in Sacramento July 1-2.
Robinson's union and the California ruling probably will be discussed at the worldwide conference of Episcopal bishops next month in England.
Most gay church weddings will likely be held at independent congregations.
"We've been doing holy unions for years," said Georgia Prescott, pastor of the Center for Spiritual Awareness in West Sacramento. "The only change now is the legal aspect."
Her church is planning a mass wedding for same-sex couples on Aug. 16, she said. "We hope to get about 100 couples."
Prescott, who met her partner at a church 20 years ago, will not be one of them. "I don't feel the need to rush, but it's something we'll consider before November," she said.
The Center for Spiritual Awareness has scheduled only three gay weddings since news of the state Supreme Court ruling broke.
"I think a lot of people are taking their time," Prescott said.
Faith leaders said they expect many gay unions will take place at courthouses.
"Churches have rejected this community for a long time. Why would they want to go to a place that has rejected them?" asked Westminster Presbyterian's Thompson.
Some churches want to promote their congregations' willingness to marry gay couples.
Leaders from Sierra Arden United Church of Christ plan to attend a gay pride event in San Francisco next week to reach out to couples. They do not have any same-sex weddings scheduled. "But we hope to, soon," said Engle.
Reform Judaism has allowed same-sex commitment ceremonies since 2000, but Rabbi Mona Alfi of Congregation B'nai Israel in Sacramento has never presided over one. No one ever asked, she said.
That has changed. Alfi will marry three couples in the next few months, all longtime members of the congregation.
"When the ruling came out, I totally cried. I was elated," said Alfi. Her first gay wedding will be a week from today.
The rabbi is preparing. "I won't be using the traditional Jewish formula which states: 'You are consecrated to me as your husband or wife,' " said Alfi. Instead, the two women each will read from the book of Ruth 1:16 which reads, "Where you go, I will go."
"It makes perfect sense to change the wording," said Alfi.
The rabbi believes the ruling was the right decision, but respects those who do not share her views.
"As a rabbi, I have a right to call this a marriage, and for churches who don't feel comfortable, that is their right," said Alfi. "Every faith is different."
Call The Bee's Jennifer Garza, (916) 321-1133.
