Today we're doing wine-poached salmon with black truffles, accompanied by a spinach soufflé.

Just kidding, and aren't you glad? I know I am.

Instead, let's whip up a cold-weather classic – short ribs of beef with egg noodles or, if you're ambitious, polenta.

That means it's time to break out the slow cooker your mom gave you when you left for college, or the one that was a wedding gift that's been stashed in the top of the closet. You'll need some measuring cups, too.

Slow cookers can be sophisticated, with digital controls, timers and programmable features ($120 to $150 for such brands as All-Clad, VitaClay Chef and KitchenAid), or not ($40 to $70 for certain models by Crock Pot, Hamilton Beach and Corningware).

A slow cooker has three basic parts – a metal heating element into which fits a ceramic or porcelain cooking vessel, which has a lid. In our case, the concept is simple: Put tough cuts of meat into the pot, add liquid and seasonings, simmer on low heat and come back later. Dinner's ready. For this meal, I used a 20-year-old, six-quart Crock Pot cooker with three settings: off, low and high.

The slow cooking breaks down the muscle and tendon in the short ribs and turns them into fall-off-the-bone chunks of rich meat, flavored by the liquids and add-ons in which they were simmered. As short ribs are cut from the chuck (the shoulder), they are fatty.

Here's what you'll need

Our ingredients can be found at most supermarkets. For this expedition, we hunted-and-gathered at the Nugget Market in the Town Center Plaza, 4500 Post St., El Dorado Hills; (916) 933-1433.

• Gold Medal flour ($2.19)

• Salt and freshly ground pepper

• McCormick Cajun seasoning ($3.79)

• 4 pounds English-cut short ribs, cut in half ($5.49 a pound for Harris Ranch brand)

• Star extra-light olive oil ($5.99)

• Fresh cilantro (89 cents)

• 2 clusters of shallots ($3.99 a pound) or 1 large yellow onion (89 cents a pound), chopped

• Fresh thyme ($1.69)

• 1 can Campbell's Double Rich beef broth ($1.79)

• 1 can Campbell's French onion soup ($1.79)

• one 6-ounce can tomato paste ($1.09)

• 1 cup red wine (your choice)

• 1/2 cup Brer Rabbit Full- Flavor molasses ($3.29)

• 1/3 cup Lea & Perrins Worcestershire sauce ($2.29)

• 1/3 cup Heinz catsup ($2.99; optional, as this will make the ribs sweeter still)

• 1/2 bottle of beer (your choice)

• Golden Grain egg noodles ($2.18)

• Heinz Savory Beef Gravy ($2.59)

Here's how to do it:

1. Pour flour in a bag, add salt, pepper and Cajun seasoning to your liking.

2. Four at a time, drop in the ribs and shake up the bag so the meat is coated in seasoned flour.

3. Four at a time, brown the ribs on all sides (except the bone side) in olive oil that has been brought to medium to medium-high heat in a frying pan (such as cast iron). Add oil as needed. Transfer the ribs to the slow cooker.

4. Meanwhile, chop up the cilantro leaves (remove the stems) and all the shallots (or onion). Hold the thyme stems vertically, and rub the tiny leaves off the stems with the fingers of your other hand.

5. In a saucepan, pour in onion soup, beef broth, tomato paste, 1 cup red wine, 1/2 cup molasses, 1/3 cup Worcestershire sauce, and 1/3 cup ketchup (optional). Add a few shakes of Cajun seasoning and some pepper. Got any fennel seeds in the cupboard? Anything else in there look interesting? Hey, toss it in. Add the herbs and shallots (or onion) to the pot and bring the mixture to a low boil at medium-high heat, stirring.

6. Pour the mixture over the short ribs in the slow cooker and add half the beer (drink the rest). Don't worry if the ribs aren't completely covered by liquid; they'll shrink and release juices (as will the shallots and herbs), adding to the volume of liquid. Stir the contents of the pot thoroughly. Set the cooker on low and simmer the ribs for 4 hours (do not remove the lid). When the time is up, stick a fork in the meat. Does it shred easily? If not, turn the temperature to a higher setting and simmer till the meat is super-tender.

7. Turn off the heat when the ribs are done and let them sit there (discard the liquid later). Cook the egg noodles according to the package directions (if you cook polenta, add some crumbled blue cheese to it).

8. Heat the gravy according to the directions on the jar.

9. For each diner, lay a bed of noodles (or polenta) on a plate, pile on some short ribs and pour on some gravy. Of course, share the rest of the bottle of wine.

Creamy polenta

Cook time: 10 minutes

Serves 4 or 5

This recipe from Margaret Fox's "Morning Food" (Ten Speed Press, $19.95 paperback, 208 pages) comes recommended by Bee copy editor Kathy Morrison. It can be served as a morning food, topped with brown sugar, but is an excellent side starch with sauced-based dishes such as short ribs or chicken cacciatore.

Note: The ratio of milk to water or broth can be increased if you prefer, as long as the liquid totals 5 cups; the recipe below uses the minimum amount of milk.

INGREDIENTS

3 cups milk

2 cups water or chicken stock or vegetable broth

3/4 teaspoon salt

1/4 teaspoon Tabasco sauce

1 cup polenta

INSTRUCTIONS

Bring the liquid to a simmer in a heavy-bottom saucepan. Add the salt and Tabasco sauce, then pour the polenta into the liquid in a heavy stream, whisking constantly over medium heat for 5 minutes or more, until the mixture thickens. Serve immediately.

Per serving based on 4 servings: 259 cal.; 9 g pro.; 41 g carb.; 6 g fat (4 sat., 2 monounsat., 0 polyunsat.); 25 mg chol.; 528 mg sod.; 1 g fiber; 9 g sugar; 22 percent calories from fat.

Call The Bee's Allen Pierleoni at (916) 321-1128.