Editor's note: Next week in the Family section, you'll find a new column from Dr. Melissa Arca, a local pediatrician who is also a mother of two, a writer and a blogger. Her blog, www.confessionsofadrmom.com, is the place where her worlds of doctor and mom collide, and it is featured at The Bee's online community forum, sacramentoconnect. sacbee.com.

It takes a village to raise a child. It also takes a village to raise a parent.

At least, it has in my case.

Many of those who shape my ability to be a good mother came from my work at The Bee, which as of this Friday, will wind to a close as I strike out on a new opportunity.

Before I leave The Bee, however, I thought I'd share a little about the people I've learned from along the way.

Kristin Hinson

I spent countless hours with Kristin Hinson while chronicling her son Noah's participation in early-intervention autism studies at the UC Davis MIND Institute, and I came away with more than stories.

Hinson's sons Justin and Simon have been diagnosed with autism spectrum disorders. Her youngest son, Noah, was exhibiting signs of autism when she enrolled him in studies as an infant. For months, Hinson's mornings and early afternoons were spent working on eye contact, language and social interaction with her toddler while also engaging 4-year-old Simon. All the while, she was shuttling Noah to the MIND Institute and maintaining Simon's in-home therapy.

When Justin, 7, arrived home from school, she'd help him with his homework, calming him when he became flustered and answering his myriad questions. Hinson also spent time with her eldest, Millie, ensuring that her typically developing daughter didn't get lost in the shuffle.

Hinson wakes early each morning to run and is home before her kids get out of bed. She's there every night to read bedtime stories in the same soothing voice she uses in the most stressful moments.

In the months I spent with Hinson, I learned how to be patient. She showed me the joy of engaging with my kids, even amid the stress, and how to appreciate the gift that each is.

Joanne Neft

A source on agriculture and food for years, Joanne Neft taught me the importance of knowing where my children's food comes from, the farmers who grew it and ranchers who raised it.

"Food that is grown, picked and produced locally is better for the individual and the environment," Neft once said.

When my family sits down to dinner at our kitchen table, I can't help but think of Neft. She taught me the beauty of slowing down to savor a meal across the table from the people you love most.

Lynn and Coco Perez

The Perezes have endured what many families hope will never happen – having a child wounded in battle. Jarus Perez, 25, suffered shrapnel wounds to his arm, back and hip when an explosive detonated just a few feet from him while he was on patrol in Afghanistan earlier this year. He came home to Carmichael for two weeks after receiving the Purple Heart, then returned to duty while still recovering from injuries.

His family has made cross-country trips to see him off on various deployments or to pick up his preschool-age daughter, Sydney, so she could be home when Daddy returned from war.

They hug him goodbye again and again. They pray so much that it's as unconscious as taking a breath.

"There's never a time when he's out of my thoughts," Lynn Perez told me earlier this year.

Jarus Perez has since returned from Afghanistan and is stationed in Texas. I am inspired by the lesson I learned from his parents: the courage to let your children go.

Doctors

Early on in parenthood, I was determined to be the best. Now, I've realized that good is great. I likely would still be stuck on "perfect" if not for the pediatricians, nutritionists, therapists and researchers I've interviewed over the years.

They taught me that parenting isn't rocket science (though it feels that way when you're trying to assemble a crib), that starting small is a great way to begin (You're not going to get a kid to eat an entire serving of broccoli right away. Just offer a few pieces and call them "trees.") and that no child is perfect. (They all throw fits, but some parents don't cop to it.)

Bee readers

Over the years, many of you have shared your joys and triumphs. You've also shared your fears and your mistakes. Every note, phone call and email taught me the value of honesty and camaraderie.

When I wrote about witnessing a woman reprimand a child in public, some of you said I was making the world a better place.

When I opened up about having guilt for being a working mother, many of you encouraged me.

"Don't feel guilty about working. If you love your job, you are a more interesting, happy person yourself and the added income makes the life of your family fuller," wrote Beverly Deen, a retired teacher and mother of four children. All of her kids graduated from large universities, she pointed out.

"I think they learned a lot about responsibility because they had a working mother," wrote Deen, of Lincoln. "So, relax, and enjoy this time of your life with joy rather than guilt."

So to all the parents, grandparents, professionals and friends I've met – thanks for your support, notes and phone calls. Thank you for sharing and listening. Thank you for helping me grow into a better parent. I'll take your advice with me.

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Call The Bee's Niesha Lofing, (916) 321-1270.

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