By Maggie Creamer
Lodi News-Sentinel
Sitting in the Stockton office of one of his attorneys, Lodi resident Michael Patrick O'Riley's hands still trembled as he clenched a Kleenex while talking about spending the last 35 days in jail.
"I'm 60 years old, never spent one night in jail. It was just a pure nightmare. And I knew the truth. I knew the facts. I knew I wasn't guilty. It was an ordeal that will stay with me forever," he said.
O'Riley was arrested Sept. 3 after his 44-year-old wife called police, and then tried to climb in the window of an arriving patrol car, according to police. She accused him of threatening and sexually abusing her. They were married in China in 2005.
A grand jury declined to indict O'Riley on any of the charges, and on Thursday morning, the district attorney's office dismissed the charges.
His attorney, Jeffrey Silvia, said in his 25 years of working in San Joaquin County, he only knew of one other instance where a grand jury did not indict.
O'Riley is soft-spoken, and on Friday, he looked exhausted and his eyes often looked down with a sad expression while recounting the past month. He said that during his time in jail he focused on reading a Bible.
"It wasn't even day by day anymore, not even hour by hour," O'Riley said. "I lived minute by minute in there and prayed almost every hour on the hour in there for the truth to come out, and that's all I was hoping for."
Because he had seen it in a movie, O'Riley took his Bible and closed his eyes while praying and dropped his finger in the book. It landed on Daniel 6, the story of Daniel in the lions den.
"That gave me a sign that everything in the end, when the truth comes out, that I'd be free. I didn't know the day or the hour or how long it would take, but I was hoping sooner than later," O'Riley said, tearing up.
One of the unanswered questions O'Riley has is why his wife called 911 on Sept. 3. He said the couple was not arguing and from what he understands, she called 911 and left the phone off the hook.
"What would cause her? I'm still asking this question after all this time in jail and having that much time to think, what reason, what would cause her to react this way?" he said.
His entire life has been torn apart, he said.
"I basically lost my marriage, could have lost my business and lost my career at Sacramento Sheriff's County Department, and lose my freedom, lose my life. What happened here? Why did this happen?"
The couple had been having marital problems, O'Riley said, and he had been staying at a hotel or with relatives before the incident.
"When you have an emotional person, you can't sometimes reason with them, so what you have to do is take yourself out of that situation," he said.
Before Sept. 3, the Lodi Police Department had been called to the home 10 times. O'Riley said at least four of the times he called 911 because of his wife's health problems. He said he also called them several times to keep the peace and went to the police station three times to get a police escort to check on his wife.
"It was no secret that I was the one calling; she wasn't the one calling," he said.
He got the escorts because he did not want a confrontation, but he wanted to make sure his wife had enough money and food, he said.
"There was so many sporadic things happening, I didn't want to go there by myself," he said.
When he was arrested at his home on Sept. 3, police took nine guns and $23,580 in cash from his vehicle.
His home is located in a business section of town, and he said it also functioned as his business, Monterey Peninsula Institute for Defense. He is a firearms instructor who attended an FBI Firearms Instructor School in 1975, he said. He has run the business at the location since 1997 and obtained a business permit from the city, O'Riley said.
He had the guns and the money in the vehicle because he said he planned on moving his business to a relative's house until things settled down at home.
Officer Heather Metcalf responded to the call and said the woman was very emotional and distraught. After speaking with the woman, she believed the woman had a reason to call police.
She had no comment on the indictment, but hopes the situation doesn't happen again.
"I want everyone to stay safe. That's the main priority," Metcalf said.
When police arrived, his wife said he threatened to kill her and had abused her for almost two years since she moved from China to the United States. She said he wouldn't let her have a job.
O'Riley said he has no idea what his wife was talking about.
"I cannot say that more emphatically -- none of it was true. None of it. I mean, not even a little bit."
O'Riley said he met his wife in 2004 on the Internet through some friends who had married other Chinese women.
He went to China two times to meet her before marrying her on the third trip in 2005. He visited her one more time before she moved to the U.S. in 2007.
He worked hard to make sure she assimilated into American culture and did not feel isolated, he said.
Some of his friends are Chinese, so she could talk with them in Mandarin, he said. She had a cell phone, house phone, a computer and often went shopping in Downtown Lodi.
He bought her phone cards, so she could talk with her family weekly. He also carried a Mandarin dictionary and picked up a few phrases like, "I love you."
He took her to a doctor who speaks Mandarin, went to a grocery store with Mandarin-speaking employees who became the couple's friends, and went to China Palace to eat out.
"I was just trying to be a good husband and make sure she had the comfort of seeing and hearing Mandarin people," he said.
He worked with her on English by spending three hours at night on Monday through Thursday for two semesters at English adult classes at Lodi High School.
She then attended Delta College classes Monday through Friday, and he often went with her to the English as a Second Language Learning Center.
He helped her get her green card, Social Security card and a driver's license.
He still does not know what her mindset was when she was speaking with police.
"I just don't know. There's been issues in her past, that may have been part of this, medical issues, but I just don't know. I'm just speculating like everyone else. I don't know everything," he said.
He wonders if part of the experience was caused by culture barriers.
"The culture is extremely different, and the language is extremely different," he said.
He said she often didn't understand colloquialisms, and he often took time to explain what he meant when he would say phrases.
For example, when she would pick up words quickly, he would say, "You're a pretty smart cookie." He said she would think silently before saying, "I'm not a cookie, I'm a girl."
In jail, he was isolated, lost 27 pounds and only had a Bible to keep him busy.
"Just imagine a normal, regular person, your dad, your uncle, your brother going into a situation like this," he said. "It is almost unbelievable. It was like I was living an out-of-body experience."
When he was released at 9 p.m. Thursday, he called his three older children from his previous marriage, other family and friends. He also received phone calls and words of support from law enforcement people he has met through his work.
He stayed with family Thursday night. The first thing he wanted to do was shower, and stayed in until the hot water ran out.
O'Riley is focused on retaining his job with the Sacramento County Sheriff's Department, where he has worked for 18 years as a civil correctional counselor at Rio Cosumnes Correctional Center in Elk Grove.
"I hope to be going back there," he said. "I have much better insight now and will do my job much more empatheticly."
He is currently on paid administrative leave while the department conducts an investigation.
His other attorney, Roger Moore, said they have not yet considered whether O'Riley will file a lawsuit over the ordeal because he is still recovering from his stay in jail.
"I'm more interested in picking up the pieces and moving on," O'Riley said.
He has a 21-year-old daughter and a 22-year-old son in college, so he hopes to help them with their education. He also has a 30-year-old daughter.
He wants to go back to his home, but he is waiting to make sure his wife is not there. He has had family check on the house and throw out old food, and they said she was not staying there.
He has no plans of contacting her in the near future because he does not want to cause another situation.
"It's out of my hands. Only God can say what's going to happen with this relationship," he said.
Maggie Creamer can be reached at:
maggiec@lodinews.com