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Carolyn Hax: It’s proving difficult to come to terms with pregnant roommate

DEAR CAROLYN: My roommate is pregnant. She will continue being my roommate for the duration of the pregnancy as her significant other – my brother – has not finished renovating their new house. This is fine.

Except for one thing: pregnancy restrictions. She can’t drink alcohol, so neither can I. She can’t eat sushi, so neither can I. Apparently you can’t have anything in the house that she’s not allowed to eat in case she goes feral in the night and stuffs it into her, poisoning her fetus in a somnambulistic feeding frenzy.

She’s always been a bit like this (diets, exercise fits) but having the “think about the baby” to wave around makes her worse. She’s so self-righteous I want to mainline tuna and crack off her baby books.

How do I stop being so annoyed by it all before sushigate causes a family rift? I don’t even like sushi that much; the only reason I want it now is spite.

To Sushi, Or Not To Sushi

DEAR SUSHI: You can address the food and resentment issues with one stroke: Buy, eat and drink what you want. “I am happy for you and happy to have you stay here, but putting me on your diet is where I draw the line. I promise I’ll be discreet.”

There are some areas where it’s essential to accommodate – no smoking around the pregnant lady – and some areas where cooperation is just the decent thing to do, such as avoiding foods that have an upsetting smell. But I would argue that you have a better chance of avoiding a rift if you avoid indulging irrational requests from Go.

Giving in to high-maintenance people always seems like the peace-makery thing to do, but it’s a short-term patch that only allows the problem to get worse. Don’t postpone the reckoning.

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