It started as a Tinder date in Bristol, England — and ended with firemen shattering a man’s window after his date got stuck trying to retrieve her own poop, according to a GoFundMe page.
Now, he’s asking for your money to help him pay for a replacement window.
The whole ordeal is detailed in a GoFundMe page by a user identified as Liam Smyth, who had an original goal of raising £200.
In the post, Smyth details how the date took a stinky turn for the worst.
At first, Smyth wrote, everything appeared to be normal.
“We had a lovely evening, and enjoyed each others [sic] company very much,” he wrote “After our meal, we repaired back to my house for a bottle of wine and a scientology doccumentary. [sic]”
Then things got weird.
Smyth’s date, who remained anonymous, went to use the bathroom, but Smyth wrote that she returned “with a panicked look in her eye.”
The woman then told Smyth what happened: She took a poop in Smyth’s toilet, but it would not flush, he wrote, so she wrapped her feces in tissue paper and tossed out it the window.
But there was just one problem, Smyth wrote.
“Unfortunately, owing to a design quirk of my house, the toilet window does not in fact open to the garden, but instead into a narrow gap of about a foot and a half, seperated [sic] from the outside world by another (non-opening) double glazed window,” he wrote. “It was into this twilight zone that my date had thrown her poo.”
He included two images of the window — one of the “offending package” and another of the narrow window gap.
Smyth wrote that he decided to go upstairs to get a hammer and chisel to smash open the window. But when Smyth was gone, his date — who he writes is an “amateur gymnast” — climbed head-first down the window to grab her wrapped poop.
She had trouble reaching the poop, Smyth wrote, until he decided to help.
“Eventually I agreed to give her a boost up and into the window,” he wrote. “She climbed in head first after her own turd, reached deeper into the window, bagged it up, and passed it out, over the top and back into the toilet from whence it came.” The situation got messier from there.
“She called out to me to help her climb out from the window, I grabbed her waist and I pulled,” Smyth wrote. “But she was stuck. Stuck fast.”
He included an image depicting his date’s unfortunate position.
With no other solution in mind, Smyth wrote that he called the fire brigade to help free his date, who had been stuck upside down in the window for 15 minutes.
Firefighters arrived within minutes, quickly freeing the woman from her trapped position.
Smyth wrote that he was thankful for the quick work of the firefighters — but added that the cost of replacing the window, which is over £300, “is my monthly budget.”
So he took to the internet, hoping to cash in on the kindness of internet strangers who could empathize with his crappy situation.
So far, Smyth has raised just over twice the amount of his original goal.
His quest for money has quickly earned attention on Twitter.
In his post, Smyth said he would split any extra money raised between two charities — Toilet Twinning, which aims to bring clean water and sanitation to impoverished areas, and another for firefighters, who he said “risk their lifes [sic] on a daily basis.”