Happy extremely long Independence Day weekend! As our thoughts turn to the nation’s glorious beginnings, it’s not actually necessary to wonder what would have happened if Donald Trump had been a founding father. Really, stick to the fireworks.
Still, the demands of concerned citizenship never wane. Let’s see how much attention you’ve been paying to current presidential events.
1. Celebrating 100 days in office, Trump looked back philosophically on his White House experience and said …
A. “I thought it would be easier.”
B. “I thought there would be better food.”
C. “I thought I could do it from Mar-a-Lago.”
2. In another 100th-day interview, Trump was grilled by CBS' John Dickerson about his Twitter claim that Barack Obama had his phones wiretapped. Trump defensively explained that …
A. “I have huge sources.”
B. “I don’t know how to spell tapp.”
C. “I don’t stand by anything.”
3. Speaking to the graduating class at the Coast Guard Academy, Trump said …
A. That he had come to regret getting out of military service for bone spurs.
B. That no politician in history “has been treated worse or more unfairly” than Donald Trump.
C. That having a great Coast Guard was the key to having a great cruise ship industry.
4. The president is leaving next week on his second trip overseas. We have hardly gotten over the first one. On a visit to Israel, Trump canceled a speech at the historic Masada site because …
A. He needed more time to prepare his remarks on Middle East peace, which he was planning to deliver in Hebrew and Arabic.
B. He wanted to throw a party for Israeli spies to make amends for leaking their secrets to the Russians.
C. It involved riding a cable car.
5. During Trump’s visit to Saudi Arabia, Commerce Secretary Wilbur Ross was thrilled by the signs that the Saudis were “liberalizing their society.” Ross pointed out that …
A. “They’ve got women all over the place.”
B. “There was not a single hint of a protester anywhere there during the whole time we were there.”
C. “The lunch at the airport was terrific.”
6. At the meeting of NATO leaders in Belgium, Trump …
A. Won hearts when he said that his first childhood memory was hearing about the Marshall Plan.
B. Won applause with his praise for “down-home Brussels hospitality.”
C. Shoved the prime minister of Montenegro out of the way so he could get to the front of the group.
7. The president has also been doing a lot of diplomacy in Washington. He recently met with the president of Panama and bragged that …
A. He’s been “working very, very hard” to get to know the names of the countries in Central America.
B. “We did a good job” building the Panama Canal.
C. Teddy Roosevelt did not get nearly as many votes as Donald Trump.
8. The budget Trump’s administration sent to Congress …
A. Counted the same $2 trillion twice.
B. Projected how much money the government could save if the national parks were turned into golf courses.
C. Was titled “Plan to Help Everyone Work,” or PHEW.
9. The tax plan Trump’s administration released …
A. Called for a large entrance fee for news conferences.
B. Called for a constitutional amendment banning hotel occupancy taxes.
C. Was only one page long.
10. Trump criticized Obama for calling the Republican health care bill mean, claiming …
A. “He actually used my term.”
B. “He underestimates the leadership potential of Mitch McConnell.”
C. “He got that from a wire tapp.”
11. The public is getting to know the Trump Cabinet. For instance, there’s H.R. McMaster, the national security adviser, who constantly tries to save the president from making monster misstatements on foreign policy. Trump likes to refer to him as …
A. “My Hector Protector.”
B. “A pain.”
C. “What’s-his-name who replaced Mike Flynn.”
12. Health and Human Services Secretary Tom Price has a deputy overseeing family planning issues who …
A. Has said “contraception doesn’t work.”
B. Believes abortion causes cancer.
C. Both of the above.
13. When asked about her father’s Twitter habits, Ivanka Trump – who has an office in the White House and the official title of special adviser to the president – said …
A. “You know, I try to stay out of politics.”
B. “This interview is about Workplace Development Week.”
C. “God, I could tell you stories.”
14. The American ambassadors to France, Germany, Italy, Norway, Denmark and Sweden …
A. Are all former executives at Goldman Sachs.
B. Joined together to petition the president to stop calling Europe “that phony continent.”
C. Haven’t been nominated.